F & R Figure Out the World

March 2014

Newest entries

More appropriate if she were a 20-year-old boy. (Actual context: the bowling alley has a "play until you win" claw machine. R&F have won 2 crappy plastic balls each.)

R: World of wonder!!
B: You're having a really good time, huh?
R: No, that's just what I call my balls.


M's screen saver shows her and I at the baby shower for F.

M: Look! I'm pregnant with F!
R: Yeah! You haven't peed him out yet!
M: Ummm
R: Like when you had me. You peed your pants with me.
M: Well, for starters, I wasn't wearing pants.
R: Mommy? Don't you know that you can SAY you peed your pants, even if you're not wearing pants?!


At Air Zoo. F has found a 6-year old girl to go on the rides with. He is reluctantly including R sometimes, she is devastated the rest of the time. Somehow I thought I had ten years before this.


R: Huh? F is having sandwiches on quesadillas?? B: They're not quesadillas. They're pita bread. F: Not pita bread, PETER PAN bread!


R: This is my FAVORITE room in the whole Kalamazoo Nature Center. You can walk around and go up and down. And there's a fake dead tree. And there's REAL dead things, too. And I know there's wiggly worms in the dirt. AND THE WHOLE ROOM SMELLS LIKE ROTTEN EGGS!!


Our family. F emerges with a wooden purple conic gamepiece.

F: Look! I found the merchant!
B&M: Hooray! Where?
F: In Mommy's slipper!
R: Oh. Yeah. I hid it there.


Winter picnic


R: Daddy, we can see atoms, right? Because we can see THINGS.
B: Well, yeah, but we can't see individual atoms.
F: I can! Because there's atoms in this!
R: I can see atoms at night, because when I go to bed, I can see whatever I want. And sometimes I want to see atoms.


F: I can't sleep.
B: I know.
F: How?
B: You're standing here taking to me.
F: Oh. Yeah.
B: And I know WHY you can't sleep.
F: Why?
B: You're too busy kicking the wall.


Poor R. She has a costume tutu that she wears day and night.

When we make her take it off so we can wash it, it's a full day of questions about when it'll be dry (it's not dryer-safe).

Today it started chafing her (if you were on a call with me and heard screaming, that's what it was).

Asked her about it in bed.

R: It's not so bad. It only hurts me when I walk. And when I stand. And when I touch it. And when I move. And when I don't move.


Cuddling in bed.

B: Is that your foot?!
R: Yeah!
B: But it's down past my knee!
R: Yeah.
B: When did you get to be so tall?
R: I'm getting bigger all the time.
B: Wow.
R: But I'm also getting closer to dying.


Tutu update. B gets a look at the red chafing welt. It looks angry.

B: That still hurts, huh?
R: Yeah.
B: But it'll hurt a little less every day.
R: Yeah. I hate that.
B: You hate the hurt?
R: No, I don't really hate the hurt. I hate that it makes me not be able to wear the tutu.



He's not just reading to her. He's "teaching her how to read the easy words."


He refused to say he was king of the world.


F needs a lullaby. B sings Over the Rainbow.

F: Daddy, wouldn't it be cool to follow a rainbow all the way to BOTH ENDS?
B: That would be pretty cool.
F: On Jake and the Neverland Pirates, one of Captain Hook's guys says that there's treasure at the end of every rainbow. Do you think that's true?
B: What do you think?
F: Well, I think that rainbows are made by raindrops getting between the sun and us in just the right way. So probably very few rainbows are caused by treasure. And if I was hiding treasure, the last thing I'd want would be a rainbow leading right to it.
B: Huh.
F: Also, I think I've only seen two or three rainbows in my whole life. But the one I remember best is when we were driving to New Jersey and there was a rainbow at the rest stop. I wouldn't let Mommy take me back to the car because I wanted to look at it. And when we finally got back to the car I thought you'd be really mad that we took so long, but you were looking at it, too.


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F & R Figure Out the World

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